Admissions Officer Advice: Making Your Essays Shine

Webinar Transcription

2024-05-13 – Admissions Officer Advice: Making Your Essays Shine

Anesha: Hi everyone and welcome to tonight’s webinar. My name is Anesha Grant. I am a senior advisor at CollegeAdvisor and I will be your moderator today. Tonight’s webinar is, “Admissions Officers Advice: on Making Your Essay Shine.” Before we get started, just to orient everyone with the webinar timing, our presenter will share some tips, resources, and guidance, and then we will open up the floor to respond to your questions in a live Q& A.

On the sidebar, you can download the slides under our handouts tab, and you can start submitting questions whenever you get ready in the Q& A tab. But first, let’s meet our presenter, Aya. Hey, Aya, how are you doing?

Aya: Hi, I am doing well. Um, hello, everyone. Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening, depending on where you are in the world.

I’m so excited to be speaking to you about something that I love to talk about. And that is. Writing college admissions essays. So just to give you a little bit, uh, background about me, I am a proud first generation college student from Detroit, Michigan. Um, and I went to Georgetown university in Washington, DC, um, where I studied sociology and then graduated and became an admissions officer, uh, there and coordinated our multicultural recruitment.

In my role, I read for four states in the Midwest, Michigan, Indiana, Ohio, Illinois. I also did various college fairs throughout the country. Um, and I also, um, did the multicultural recruitment, particularly the African American recruitment for the university. After my tenure in admissions, I then went on to England to get my master’s in philosophy of education at the University of Cambridge, um, as a recipient of the Gates Cambridge scholarship.

And then while in England, I also serve as a alumni interviewer for Georgetown. So I got to interview students in the London metro area who were interested in applying to Georgetown. So that was really fun. Um, I am now working. finishing rather my PhD in sociology at the University of Michigan, where I get to study, uh, the college admissions essay, particularly trauma narratives in the college admissions essay.

So I’m super, super excited to be speaking with you all about making your essay shine. I’ve been working with CollegeAdvisor going on my fourth admission cycle in the fall. So looking forward to answering your questions.

Anesha: Before we let you get started, we’re just going to do a quick poll to see what grade folks are in.

If you’re a parent or a teacher, you are welcome, but go ahead and select other. You don’t have to put the specific grade level as we’re waiting. Um, a lot of folks ask the question and the last time we did the session, when should I start working on, um, the personal statement? So I’m wondering if you have a thought about like, when, when is the right time for students to kick off this process?

Aya: Yeah, great question. I just jumped off a call with a student right before joining this webinar and the student is a junior in high school who just finished his AP exams and our conversation primarily today was about writing his college personal statement. So I’ll say now if you are a junior in high school, um, often students will use that summer before their senior year to really dig into the essay.

It’s always really great that by the time the common app, uh, portal resets, which is typically August 1st, I believe that you have a draft of that personal statement since those prompts have already been released and they won’t be changing from last year. So I say, you know, after those AP exams, after, you know, perhaps prom and some of those celebratory moments happen that it’s okay to start working on that college admissions essay.

In the summer, primarily the personal statement, which is that, oh, and I’ll talk a little bit more about that during our conversation. So I think it’s time if you’re a junior is the summer before your senior year. It’s a really, really great time to start.

Anesha: Thank you for that advice. We’ll go ahead and close our poll and just let you know that.

The majority of folks with us are juniors or parents or teachers who are in the space. So I think a lot of students are in that ideal space, uh, to start working on it as they wrap up the end of their academic year. All right, I’ll stop talking, hand it over to you, Aya, and be back a little bit later.

Aya: Fantastic. Thank you so much. All right. So to dive in, um, let’s just kind of set the stage here. You know, what essays do students have to write for their college application? So the essay you probably hear the most about, the one I study, and the one that dominates most of the discourse in higher education, is the college personal statement.

So that is the one essay that you draft, that 650 word essay. That you submit to all of your schools on your common, uh, common app list, right? So, it’s one essay that talks about who you are. You respond to one of the six or seven questions. I think the seventh is like, choose your own. Um, and you really get to showcase your student voice, your writing skills, and really add context and depth to your application.

So, that’s the college personal statement. Second, you have the supplemental essays, or the supplement essays, which are additional essays that some schools have that invite students to write, um, or respond to questions that are often school specific. So that might be the standard, why Georgetown question, or why Columbia question, okay?

Um, again, unlike the personal statement, supplement essays are required by only some colleges, and they are, again, are used to highlight that, They also vary quite a bit in length. It could be a one word response. It can say in one word, describe how you feel right now. It could be writing a letter to your future roommate, like Stanford does.

Um, it could be, you know, list your favorite songs like Columbia has. So they vary greatly. They can be as long as 650, even longer. Um, or they might just be a few sentences. Okay. And then you have the scholarship essay, which is again less common for at for school specific scholarships, but students are applying increasingly to scholarships to help, you know, to feel, feel the financial a gap, right?

So students may be invited to write an additional essay for a merit based scholarship or grant, but students also might select scholarships to apply for that they find online. So there is an additional scholarship essay. Um, which often comes after if you’ve written that college personal statement in that supplemental essay, which is great because you can really then pull and reuse elements from previous essays.

So these are three of the main kind of essays that students are often encountering and writing for their undergraduate college application. Now, what is the significance of the essay? Um, you see here in bold, unique touch, uh, that is one of the many, uh, important kind of rationales that universities have.

for the college admissions essay. I mean, one of the, the, the, my favorite parts when I worked as an admissions officer for Georgetown was the essay because I felt like I got to hear directly from students. Um, I got to hear their personality. I get to read about their life and their backgrounds, the things they’ve endured, things they’ve overcome, the things that they love, the things that make them afraid, the things that brought them joy.

Um, and I always love that opportunity to just see the students talking, right? Because when you think about the application, the grades. The test scores, the extracurricular activities, the letters of recommendation. There are so many parts of the application that we’re hearing from other people. So the essay is a really great opportunity for you to tell your story in your own words and that we can hear from you.

Also, when you think about the numbers, again, the grades and the test scores, those are quantitative aspects, right? So it, the essay also gets to add some more qualitative information to your application. And lastly, as I said earlier, It can provide additional context about your background, identity, past and circumstances.

One thing that’s not listed here that I also think is important to add, increasingly so, is when you see schools that particularly are highly selective, and I’m, I mean, I’m talking about the schools that admit less than, you know, 20%, 25 or 20 percent of the students who apply, they’re often encountering very competitive applicant pools where students share similar profiles as it relates to grades and test scores.

So then the essay also becomes important to you. Not only help students stand out, but again, give the admissions officers other things about the applicants to work with as they make their decisions. So speaking of standing out, uh, what factors make for a great essay? Again, a great essay, it was really preventing, uh, presenting information that’s focused, it’s thoughtful, um, it uses concrete examples to convey, to convey points.

It focuses on examples of the present and near past, um, uses a broad range of information. Course, good grammar and really tells the admissions office about personal triumphs, challenges, leadership experiences outside the class, not exclusively. Of course, you can talk about things that happened inside the classroom.

I also want to continue. Okay, I was going to go on and aside, but here are some additional other areas that really help students kind of stand out or more importantly, make for a great essay. You know, answer the question that is should be number one, right? Because it is, you know, incredibly, incredibly important, especially in the case of the supplementals that you’re answering the question.

Um, you also want to effectively describe how they experienced the detail has led to personal growth. Again, understanding, maturity, character, open mindedness, right? So it’s just not good enough to say this thing happened to me. Okay, it’s also what happened after that. What did you learn? How did you grow?

Very important narrative. Um, and also a good essay really reflects a student’s voice. Again, polished, free of major grammatical errors. And there’s all types of plugins now, Grammarly and all types of sites where you can make sure that your essay is polished. Uh, but also you don’t want to submit an essay that is so overly edited, where it’s like, it’s basically your parents wrote it, or your teacher wrote it, or.

Sounds like someone else who, you know, has, you know, 15 additional years of education wrote it. Essay also should really, uh, kind of prioritize making sure that it aligns with the senses. Um, so I always say essays that really stand out to also really capture You know, what you saw, how you felt, what you tasted, what you smelled, you know, really just making sure that the senses are prioritized.

So given that, what are some of the common mistakes to avoid in college essays? There are quite a few. Um, the first is, and this happens a lot, um, writing essays that focus on other people. So you might say, well, I, uh, So one of the prompts ask, you know, ask me to talk about someone who inspires me. So of course I’m going to write about my grandpa, right?

He inspires me or my father or my dad or my sibling, um, whomever, right? There are people in your life that might really inspire you. Or have motivated you to pursue your academic interest. Um, however, we want to make sure that the essay is still capturing who you are. Okay. So for an example, I I’ve seen, I saw this a lot.

I still see this to this day where students, you know, they might. I say, telling the story of their grandparents being like the first, you know, woman to graduate from a college in the country or the first woman to graduate from a medical school. And therefore they want to become a doctor. Right. But the essay becomes an entire story about the journey of grandma.

And we walk away as readers and admissions officers saying, wow, we really wish we can admit grandma to our school. Right. So you also want to make sure that you are talking about your parents. personal experiences. Okay, everything to do. Um, and particularly this is incredibly salient point right here is to avoid writing essays about overly common or controversial topics such as sports and politics.

Now you might say Aya I want to go to a school in DC because I want to be a, um, secretary of state, or I want to be an ambassador, or I want to be the president or Supreme court judge, whomever, right? So politics might be at the core. I mean, again, I went to Georgetown, uh, we talked about politics all the time and students.

will apply to study government to be in politics, right? That is fine, but what happens is if students kind of take hard stances and lean in in a way, um, that may offend readers who are diverse in backgrounds, lived experiences, walk of life, it also could, you know, have a negative impact on the application.

Um, as much as, you know, admissions officers are, you know, ethical, maintain integrity, really take their job seriously. They’re also human. And in most cases at particularly, uh, more selective universities, there are humans reading the applications, not, you know, AI robots and such. So just thinking about, you know, being respectful and appropriate, right?

You can take a stance for sure, right? But you just want to be respectful and appropriate and know your audience. Um, also writing essays that read way too formal to the point it’s like, And then you’ll see later in here, overly use of a thesaurus. I see that a lot students using adjectives or verbs that may be less appropriate given the context, but you know, dictionary.

com says it’s a synonym. So therefore they use it. Um, so you just want to make sure it’s honoring your voice and there are students who are amazing writers even at the high school stage. That’s fine. I’m not saying dumb yourself down or to change your prose, but just making sure that it’s not being over edited to the point that we lose you.

Um, also mentioning experiences without describing them. As I said earlier. It’s not enough to say, you know, this thing happened to me, but you don’t paint a picture for us. Again, thinking about the senses, what you saw, how you felt, what you smelt, what you taste, you know, really making sure that you are activating the senses and describing these moments because we were not there, you know, or just like dropping things in.

You know, yesterday I, I lost sleep. my shoe and then just pivoting to talk about something else. You know, why should we care? You know, you really want to make sure the why the audience should care is very clear. Um, this happens a lot too. Students writing complex sentences that could be written in multiple smaller sentences.

So we’ve seen those paragraphs. It’s one, it might be a semicolon and it’s like eight line and it’s just one paragraph and one sentence, you know? So you really want to make sure that if they’re, you know, that you’re not, Having these very long, complex, convoluted sentences, it actually becomes very taxing on the reader to just keep searching for punctuations.

Like, we need a period, exclamation point, question mark, something. Okay? Um, you want to avoid a passive voice whenever possible. Um, and that’s just, you know, writing, just a writing style that is just, you know, It just kind of helps the reader more closely kind of follow the story. It puts you in the action, right?

So you really just want to make sure in the active voice, the subject of a sentence is doing the action. So it’s direct, it’s clear, it’s easy to read. It’s again, it’s not a hard rule, but I think essays and stories that use active voice whenever possible is, reads better. And then, um, you want to avoid, and this is a really important thing, using AI and artificial tools, such as ChatGPT to write your essays.

Now, um, ChatGPT in particular could be a helpful tool for brainstorming. It’s a way to, you can, you can Google or use ChatGPT to like help you compile a list of five scholarships or so, or 10 scholarships that aligns with your region, your city, your zip code, your high school. Um, you can, Use it to say, help me create a calendar to organize, you know, my writing strategy.

There’s so many ways it could be a helpful tool. You should not be submitting a ChatGPT essay. First of all, as much as we say, AI is getting sophisticated. When I read an essay or it tweets, Instagram caption, whatever. That was written solely by ChatGPT, I can tell, and perhaps I’m someone who reads a lot because I’m finishing a PhD and I’m reading every day, every second.

Um, but the, it just feels wonky. It feels, um, it’s an interesting cadence. Um, it’s, there’s things that we’ve, we’ve picked up. Also, some schools, um, are trying to figure out how to deal with it. So they might start, you know, using resources and tools that can tell whether or not something was written. Um, You know, by a chat GBT or another AI chat bot, etc.

So you just want to tell your own story and your own words. You do not need ChatGPT.

Anesha: Okay. You do not need ChatGPT. A good note to end on before you transition. Um, So another quick, uh, poll for folks is let us know where you are in the process. If you started, you’re working on essays. If you have not started, totally fine. Um, thank you for all of that great information. I was wondering, speaking of ending on this note of ChatGPT, what do you, what do you think students won’t find on ChatGPT that they think that they will.

Like, why isn’t that a good resource?

Aya: Well, they won’t find themselves on ChatGPT. So ChatGPT does not know you. It doesn’t know your mom. It doesn’t know your dad. It doesn’t know your siblings. It doesn’t know how you felt. When you were disappointed, it doesn’t know your life story. It doesn’t know your personality, right?

It is not there to create your, you know, it’s not a reflection of who you are. Right. It’s, it’s, it’s literally a reflection of thoughts and ideas from thousands of now, probably now millions of people and from all websites all over the world. So you lose the essence. Um, and also again. It is a compilation of, an amalgam of all types of thoughts and words and searches that people have put into that, the bot, and it’s spitting it back out to you in a way that has no personality, um, or flair.

So I think, You and you lose out on the writing exercise because it is you’re going to write a lot of essays, not just for the college application, but also in school as well in college. Um, so you’re also losing an opportunity to have fun with this essay and also to get some writing, um, you know, under your belt as well.

So I, I think you just lose out on the practice of kind of writing about yourself in a really meaningful way.

Anesha: Love that. Yeah, I mean, that is absolutely what they’re missing is personality and real life experiences. So, um, appreciate that. Okay, I’m going to go ahead and close our poll. So, um, the majority of folks are researching schools.

So, in that process of figuring out where they’d like to apply, um, 17 percent have not started or are working on essays or are getting the application materials together. Um, so most folks are still researching and everyone else is kind of stuck. All right. Um, I know you have some more slides to present, so I’ll let you finish up, and then we’ll be back for the Q& A in a few minutes.

Aya: Fantastic. Thank you so much. So what’s next? So, um, how can students write creatively about themselves while still being clear and concise? Um, again, using specific examples, Being concrete, focusing on examples on the present and your past, incorporating elements of culture, language, expressions, expressions that reflect who you are, defining less well known terms or expressions in your essay, limiting kind of flowery, abstract language.

I know sometimes there’s some creative writing that students like. I think creative writing is fine, but sometimes it is so meta that I don’t know. It’s hard to follow what is happening. Um, so, and again, I also encourage students to think about the five senses. I think that’s a really great way to just really show, um, you know, what is happening.

You know, it helps for the people around you to get a better sense of the experience and how, how, how you’re relating to it. It puts us into the movie. It’s not us just at home watching it. So, you know, really be specific. Okay. Um and think about editing your essays. There’s a lot of tools to do so You can use the read aloud feature on Microsoft word I don’t know if people still use Microsoft word as much because of the google suites But I love the Microsoft word especially for really long documents.

Um, so you can use the read aloud feature You also want to proofread? And if you cannot do it have someone else do it. I always like to use this example For an example, you know, um, someone writes, I enjoy torturing animals. I have volunteered torturing animals at a local shelter since eighth grade. And the experiences solidify my desire to become a veterinarian.

Now I don’t know about you, but veterinarians should not be torturing animals. And I doubt that the student wanted to write an essay about torturing animals and that they meant to say training. And here torturing is spelled correctly, right? So you have a word spelled correctly and because you know as the writer that you meant to say training, um, you are correcting it in your mind.

Your brain is correcting it every time you read it. So you’re just wrote an essay about torturing animals, right? So this is why proofreading is, is, is essential. And it is even more, um, it’s even more important that after you finish a draft that you take some time off before reviewing it again. What this means is if the application is due at 11:59 Eastern Standard Time, you should not, you know, be finishing the essay at 11:53, right? That is too it’s too short of time for you to breathe get it read it with a fresh pair of eyes You’re panicking You also don’t want to create a habit of procrastination because that will be brutal in college I’ll tell you that now so you also just want to give your time, you know What I do often when things are due I lie to myself about deadlines So I tell myself I even put it in my calendar.

That’s something that’s due You know You know, 3 to 4 days earlier than it is, because that becomes the deadline that I’m working towards and if I have more time, I can’t even make the deadlines earlier, but life doesn’t always work that way. So you really want to make sure that you’re finishing your statement.

You know, ideally two weeks earlier, right? Um, just so you have time to have a teacher or counselor or someone you trust review the statements And you want to respect their time as well So what are the essays that have stood out to you? I often get this question um And again in different strokes for different folks as I mentioned earlier admissions officers come from all types of backgrounds identities walks of life different lived experiences some of them might be first generation college students like I am You Some of them might be legacy students like others that might come from rural communities.

Some might come from urban centers, some might come up, you know, middle class in a suburb. So they can really vary and consequently essays that might stand out to me may not stand out or resonate with others. Um, but given that, you know, essays that really, um, I like essays where students have showed or demonstrated a level of reflection.

So, uh, essays that reflect student ambition and growth. essays that highlight student tenacity and essays that paint colorful photos of the human experience. Um, I often think about those essays where, um, students who’ve had jobs, and I’m not saying shadowing a hospital, I’m saying a job where, um, you know, they worked at Jimmy John’s, right?

And essentially they are, you know, working in the drive thru window and they talk about all the people that they met or they talk about being a, working, you know, 10 hours a week in high school, right? Um, they talk about their colleagues and the customers that come in or they’re regulars, um, or cleaning the floors or, you know, making the sandwiches and just the life lessons they learn through these, what may seem to be just regular experiences, but have been monumental or significant or transformational for them.

Uh, I think so often students are thinking about how can I stand out to the point that. They’re like trying to find these grandiose ideas when your daily routine, um, or maybe your Sunday night routine with your family where every Sunday night you all have a family dinner and you make a, you eat a specific thing because it’s your mom or your favorite food.

Or every Sunday you say you go out to a restaurant from a different culture and you try Ethiopian food one day, Indian food another day. That is important, right? So I also want. You to know that it’s okay, like you don’t have to create a grandiose. You don’t have to create a narrative that doesn’t, that isn’t authentic to you, um, that your story in itself, given how it’s written could certainly be, uh, that one that stands out.

So with this, as we think, uh, think through some of the, like, the final, um, tips or areas where, um, you all can kind of think about crafting this essay or making it shine. You know, I often say, and you often hear these remarks, you know, show don’t tell, right? So instead of I learned, uh, a lot volunteering at the Cleveland animal shelter, you know, try while feeding the sick puppies with the other shelter volunteers.

I learned the importance of teamwork and passion. So you’re telling us what you did, right? And how, and how you learned and from where you learned, right? Like what activities you did to actually learn. That is what’s being, you know, shared here. You also want to share lessons learned, as I just said. So you really want to make sure that you’re, You write about, uh, how a particular experience informs your future, the type of student you’ll be in, you know, in college, or just, you know, how, how has it helped you grow?

Like, what does that look like? Maybe you had an encounter with someone who was on the street who was asking for, you know, food and water. And perhaps you had at one point this very negative outlook on people who didn’t have shelter or houseless people, but you decided one day to just ask them, you know, what their story was.

And it completely transformed how you understood what does it mean to be without shelter, to be homeless or houseless, right? So I think you really need to just kind of drive home. Okay. You tell us the story. What did you learn? Where do you go from here? Again, I cannot stress enough the importance of proofreading.

So you want to use that read aloud feature again to capture correctly spelled words used in the wrong way. You want to use Grammarly plugin if you have just to kind of check. You want mom, dad, sister, teacher, cousin, whomever to look over your essays to proofread them for you. Um, and to proofread yourself.

So you don’t want to wait to the last minute. I cannot stress that enough. You want to have your, um, essays completed as early as you can so you can have time to breathe. Especially, especially if you’re applying early action or early decision with those November 1st deadlines. Do not, you know, you don’t want folks to be knocking on your door, you know, asking for candy while you’re still working on your essays That’s not fun.

You also want to tell your story. Um, you want to write about your own experiences not someone else’s again This does not mean you cannot talk about people who motivate and inspire you It does it does not mean that you cannot talk literally mention other people in your your essays by all means do that If it’s important to the story I just want you not to write an essay that is solely about someone else’s journey and neglects your own journey.

So those are some things I, I really want to encourage you to think about as you approach, if you have already started approaching, or as you think about in the near future, uh, making your essay shine for your college application.

Anesha: All right. Thank you so much, Aya, for that amazing presentation. You’re always so thoughtful with a lot of great tips for our students. So that is the end of the formal presentation portion of our webinar tonight. We are going to move into the live Q& A. The way that the Q& A will work is that you can go ahead and submit a question.

I will paste it in the public chat so other folks can see it and read it aloud to give Aya a chance to answer. If you’re having any challenges with submitting questions, just know that you might have to log out and log back in and double check that you are logging in. through the link you received via email and not from our webinar landing page.

Um, also the webinar is being recorded so you can review it at a later time. It’ll be up on the CollegeAdvisor webinar page by tomorrow morning. Um, my first question for you, Aya, I feel like you tilted and hinted towards this, but didn’t say it explicitly. So I’ll ask it explicitly. Who is reading the common essay?

Aya: That’s a great question. So, um, the person or people who might read your Common App essay are the admissions officers, um, at the schools that you kind of identified that you want to submit the essay for. And these are the schools that also require the Common App essay. Because you might apply to 12 schools on the Common App and only eight of them might actually even require a personal statement at all.

Um, so the other four, um, They’re not going to, you know, they’re going to disregard it. So the schools that require a personal statement and the school that you’ve selected to submit your application, um, those admissions officers will most likely be reading the common app essay. Now, in addition to that, um, admissions offices have certainly different types of admissions policies and practices.

Some, uh, universities have admissions officers who are assigned to a region or assigned to students from certain areas or zip codes or school districts. Um, so it could be that person. Some universities have second reader admissions practices where, uh, someone in the regional officer might read it, but someone else from a different region may also read it.

They also have committee practices where some admissions officers, um, might get together in a room, like, um, a, a, a show on television, and they will discuss your application, um, and those committees can be made up of students, professors, deans, admissions officers, you name it. So, it could be only one person reading that essay, it could be a committee, it could be several people reading that essay, but the essay is going to the schools that you’ve selected to apply to.

On the common application and those in those schools also will have to be schools that actually require the common app essay to begin with.

Anesha: Thank you for that detailed response. My next question for you is regarding format. So someone asked what format should the essays have written in? You have to write it in a certain format

Aya: format as in prose.

I mean, we often get questions from students asking whether or not it’s appropriate to write a poem. I, I would caution a student from writing a poem. Um, I would a poem or a recipe. Uh, when I worked in admissions, I would get so many, for some reason, students writing their, um, essays like, it’s a recipe, you know, I’m a one cup of joy and, uh, a teaspoon of spunk.

And it’s, it became very cliche because I saw, started to see it so often. I was like, wow, who knew? students who are doing this. Um, so you want to just write in the prose and traditionally you intro, you know, middle and conclusion. Um, you can begin, as students might begin with a quote, they actually might begin with a line from a poem.

But, um, when I think about like traditional, you really want to kind of set the stage, um, in the beginning, make sure it’s clear, you know, the who, what, when, where, why, as you’re reading, it should be clear what you’re talking about. And then often students might wrap up talking about. Lessons learned areas of growth.

You also might see that in reverse, like the inverted pyramid where students talk about lessons learned and then Spend the time talking about how they got there from the particular moment. So students take similar approaches or different approaches rather when it comes to that. But, um, yeah, there isn’t like, uh, again, with the exception of, you know, make sure it’s written in English.

The comment requires that. It needs to be written in English. If you do use language that is not English, make sure things are translated. You know, if you choose to use Arabic or you choose to have, you know, Spanish, make sure that there is some translation so that your audience knows what you’re talking about.

Um, but besides that, I mean, it is open and I’ll say this, you can look online. There’s so many samples of common app essays or personal statements. Um, so if you were like, I still don’t. know where to start. There are, um, samples everywhere. Did I answer the question?

Anesha: You did. Yeah, no, you’re great. Um, I think the point being that there’s no specific structured, um, format, but you can be experimental, but not too experimental, I think is what you were saying.

Um, Just speaking just to wrap up the format question because this was a follow up that we got was, uh, the number of words. So 650. What? How do you shape up that 650? You have to hit 650. Is there a minimum?

Aya: Um, the max is 650. You don’t have to hit it. I always encourage students to be around the 500 to 650 mark.

Um, just if you’re applying, especially a school that’s competitive, and you know, you get 650 words and you choose to use 200, it looks like you didn’t take it seriously. It does not look like you thoroughly addressed the prompt or the question, um, and it may just look like it was half. you know, haphazardly kind of put together.

So you do want to try to take up the space. And again, my, I always say at least 500 words for that personal statement, just to be on the safe side.

Anesha: Thanks for that. I’ll follow up. Uh, the next question is, how do you not be a perfectionist when writing your essay?

Aya: I mean, it’s tough. Um, I think one of the, best ways to to not be a perfectionist.

First of all perfectionism looks different for different types of people So getting to the root cause of why you think it needs to be perfect. There’s no such thing as a perfect essay um So you just really want it to be finished. I also think having others, you know people you trust Have them look at it but limit that you know, you don’t want to have everybody you’ve ever met um reading your essay because you can There’s there is a such thing as too many cooks in the kitchen I also just want you to kind of trust that whatever essay that you ultimately end up with is one that you felt Most aligned with who you are your passions and you want to edit it You want to give yourself time and space to do that, but you also don’t want to scrutinize it to the last hour um Yeah, but perfectionism is difficult because that’s often an internal process and often a response to something, our own kind of lifestyles, backgrounds, and experiences.

I said this as someone who struggled particularly early on with perfectionism. Um, now I am very much, this is the best I’ve done. This is all I have to offer at this stage. I’m pressing submit and I’m closing my computer. So, you just have to be comfortable with knowing that there’s no such thing as perfect.

And that you’ve done your best, right? That you’ve done your due diligence. You started early, you had someone proofread it, you edited it, you shared it with a counselor, someone you trusted, you took another look at it, and you press submit. Um, you just want to make sure you check those boxes, and then press submit.

There’s literally, you know, You know, it is one part of a application as well. It’s an important part, but it’s not the most important part. You really want to make sure your grades, and if the school requires them, test scores are, you know, aligned with your academic goals and interests. And then make sure that SA is, you know, is in the best shape it can be in.

But the perfectionism is, again, rooted in our own kind of beliefs of what is perfect and what isn’t perfect. The why we think we need to be perfect is also a deeper question that I unfortunately cannot answer for for you, but I think that’s a really great question. And I know a lot of people myself included at the application stage or something.

That’s something I struggle with. I was like, I have to be perfect or else. And you will be fine. I

Anesha: think, I’ve seen in that search for perfect, we just keep editing a good essay. And looking for things to be wrong with it. And the perfectionism, um, kind of game. And so you just kind of get caught where the essay never feels done.

Because you’re just Every time at least I’ve gotten it as an editor, they’re like, what’s wrong with it? And I’m looking for something to be wrong with it and kind of nitpicking it to a point. So, um, yeah, I think it also perfectionism just knowing that at some point the essay has to be just done. Um, okay.

Uh, the next question is, Should I focus on a single significant experience or try to incorporate multiple aspects of my identity or background in the essay?

Aya: Again, it really depends on how that’s written. It’s hard to say absolutely no or absolutely yes. I think most students, um, tend to err on the, let me write about one significant, um, moment and kind of go into detail about what they learned, how they, uh, what they’ve endured.

Etc. Um, so I think that helps the essay to be clear, focused, specific, and concise in a way that I think could be incredibly helpful, especially if you’re a student who’s like, uh, I’m here, they’re up, down, left, right, chair, fish, everywhere. Um, but I, I’ve seen essays where students have done like multiple vignettes of different moments, but connected them in a way that was like, uh, relevant and understandable for the audience.

I just worry about students who talk about too many things and then the essay becomes unfocused and it sounds like you’re throwing everything but the kitchen sink in the essay. So you want the story to be cohesive, right? You want to make sure it’s concise. You want to make sure, more importantly, it’s focused and that it answers the question.

So again, I, you can write an essay that is about one significant moment going to depth, right? Detail, paint those photos and pictures for us. And there are ways to talk about multiple moments, but showing the ways that they’re connected. You just want to think about space and you, you want to think about cohesion.

So if you cannot be, if you cannot cohesively talk about multiple events and it’s distracting to the reader, I would, I would stay away from that and just focus on one significant moment.

Anesha: We, um, had a question last time we did the session on, um, if a thesis statement is needed. And I think that In that sense, yes, like at the end of the day, all the different components that you talk about have to come back to some, to making one central point or explaining one central characteristic about yourself.

Um, okay. My next question for you are, is art mission directors looking for a perfectly written essay? Do you need to be obsessed with grammar, um, and use words like that that make you sound like a genius? Um, can the way that you write, especially if you write less formally than others affect your chances?

Aya: I mean, it can, it can affect your chances, but that doesn’t make it a bad effect or good effect. We just, you know, um, yeah. So as I said during the presentation, I do think there’s an obsession with the sources and. Sounding so formal and that just sounds unnatural. It sounds forced and it doesn’t sound like a high school senior is writing.

So you want to speak, you want to write formally in essence of you’re applying for something that is consequential and important, but you are also not a college professor and you’re not, you know, writing a speech for a Nobel peace prize, or you’re not a sociologist writing the dissertation. So, um, it is fine to, uh, write in the, in the level.

Uh, at a level that is appropriate for you, um, you do not have to, um, try to be even over like more formal or use words and you know, as far as grammar again, as I mentioned, Grammarly, you know, I have that plug in I can help with like grammar things. They’re not in 99. 99 percent of the cases going to say, Oh, my God, this person used a comma when they semicolon and throw your application out or they might.

You know, you want to go over it. You want to proofread it. This is why you do not want to procrastinate. Um, but it is okay if it does not sound, um, like you are on the episode of Bridgerton

Anesha: on the episode of Bridgerton. Yes. That’s like just overly kind of like written, um, very proper language that comes out unnatural. Um, all right, I’m going to take a break and do a quick little PSA. CollegeAdvisors team of over 300 former admissions officers and admissions experts are ready to help you and your family navigate the admissions process in one on one advising sessions.

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And so much more. Excuse me. Uh, we will leave that QR code up on the screen and get back to our Q& A. My next question for you, Aya, which I think is kind of a question within your specialty, um, how can I include my weaknesses without looking bad or avoiding a victim narrative?

Aya: Um, that’s an interesting question because weakness and victim narrative, uh, necessarily, um, synonymous.

Um, and it, and it also, it, it depends on what, what’s the question, what you’re responding to it and how you’re responding. And a weakness could be, um, something like, uh, poor time management, um, or like I spend too much time, uh, working out and not enough time on my homework. Um, or a weakness could be like, I just cannot run a mile under 10, uh, it takes me, it takes me over 10 minutes to run a mile and I need to run under 10 minutes to get on the track team or something.

Um, but a victim narrative to me, um, it’s hard. I would need to, the sociologist wants me to like, you need to find what that means, but essentially. What I hear is students often feeling like they, um, that they have to write about things that they’ve endured or adversity that they’ve endured or had to overcome to be salient or legible for institutions.

Um, and that is not always the case for some students, something that they’ve had to overcome or that they experience a hardship is very critical to who they are, their upbringing, their background, who they want to be, their future, et cetera. So they choose to write about it, but I don’t think that inherently.

It means that that’s a victim narrative. Uh, victim narrative has just a really negative connotation in my mind. Um, but, um, yeah, it just really, it’s hard to answer that question without like knowing what the topic is. or knowing, um, what the weakness is, because I do want to say you are trying to put your best good best foot forward.

So writing an essay about a weakness that may show or may present as you don’t take college, you wouldn’t take college seriously, or that you wouldn’t be a good roommate, or you wouldn’t be a good teammate, or you wouldn’t be a good student in a classroom. You probably don’t want to write about those things because they, the admissions officers don’t know you.

So they only know what you tell them. So that may not be your best foot forward. I’m not saying lie or misrepresent who you are, but there might be other parts of your identity and background or experiences that might be more appropriate for your missions essay. So, um, I wouldn’t need to know why or what the motivation is behind writing about a weakness and what the weakness is to have a better, stronger kind of sense of if it’s absolutely no.

But I do think you want to take a more. You know, strength, uh, approach, I think, in the college application. We all have weaknesses, but I don’t think we all need to write about them.

Anesha: That’s I appreciate the framing of that of, like, what in what context are you trying to write about a weakness? And why do you feel like you need to talk about it?

Because I think focusing on strength space is more to your more of the goal of the college application. So I appreciate that turn. Um, this is, I guess, a similar question of, like, it perhaps depends on the student, but do you have any tips for students who struggle with writing about themselves and their personal journeys?

Aya: Can you say that one more time?

Anesha: Sorry, yeah, I went through it quickly. Do you have any tips for students who struggle with writing about themselves and their personal journeys?

Aya: Yeah, I know that is actually a challenge that a lot of people, students, adults struggle with, just writing about themselves broadly.

Um, well, I would say first go to the The prompts themselves and and this is what we I did earlier with the student. I was having a meeting with they went to the prompts and we just have to kind of go through and say, like, which prompts resonated with them and they help them kind of just like name one experience that they feel like connected to the prompt.

I just think that’s just like a very, like, kind of light hearted, easier way to kind of get the juices flowing and I also tell students. You don’t have to have these grand, lofty, grandiose ideas. It is okay if you start brainstorming by writing, um, just a story about your day. Like, what happened today? Or what is your weekly routine or your morning routine?

I remember when I was doing college personal statement exercises when I was in high school, we would have to write small vignettes or responsive prompts via vignettes. And one would be like, how, like describe, like how you brush your teeth. That sounds like so ridiculous, but it was just a way for us to kind of get to Start thinking through how we describe our like our lives and our personal experiences.

So I think that that’s always a good way I also think another fun tip is asking someone that you know and trust it could be your friend assembly your parent your teacher your mentor to describe You ask them how they would describe you and because sometimes other people see things that we don’t see in ourselves And I think that can kind of take a wall down if they say oh, you’re actually really funny or I find your humor You know, so sometimes hearing how people describe us is actually a really great way It kind of gives us the courage to be like, oh I am funny Um, or I really am kind or I really do love animals or whatever it might be.

So I think though, um, That’s a great way. Um Yeah, and yeah, I think those are some uh Those are a few tips I would encourage a student to pursue and thinking about, like, just getting the juices flowing to start writing about themselves.

Anesha: I appreciate that. It made me think. I have one student who’s currently a sophomore who journals after big events, either that they’ve led or gone through just to have, I think, in preparation for having some of those vignettes ready.

Just thinking about what are challenges they face in trying to execute this particular project this year over some victories that they had had that they overcome the challenges like that. So, I think even pushing yourself to do a little bit of journaling here and there would help you get ready for the type of writing.

you need to pursue. How. How should, how much should I focus on the college’s values and mission in my essay?

Aya: Yeah, um, in your personal statement, you’re applying, again, you’re submitting one essay to a, um, an array of schools. So, they may have different missions and values. I think generally, schools would say they’re very similar.

They, they, like, they want students who are curious and, you know, intellectually curious, might have a global focus. Mindset, et cetera. So there might be similarities, but the person statement is going to, you know, all 15 schools on the list, right? So you don’t want to be speaking specifically about one institution because schools vary in the personal.

I’m sorry. Supplements or the for the supplemental essays when they say why. Why Georgetown? Why Brown? You know, why UFC? You do want to invoke values that the schools kind of herald as important to them. You know, if you’re applying to Howard, you know, truth and service. I mean, service is very much a part of their mission, their values.

So you do want to respond to that when I asked, why do you want to go to Howard University or why Howard? Right? You want to say how those values align with the work that you’re doing and the person you hope to be in the future and how Howard will help you get to where you want to go. So you, you want to talk about those things.

Um, that’s, that is important because schools are looking for fit at the end of the day and they’re trying to build a class, a class of students who are committed, um, to, you know, the school’s values and institutional priorities. But also. Could be committed to each other. That would be a good classmate, a good roommate, et cetera.

So in the personal statement, not appropriate to lean into specific values, uh, institutional values. Again, say you are a service oriented person. I don’t really know any school that say, Oh my God, this student wrote an essay about service. No, like, you know, in that case, right about service. But if it relates, if it’s about school specific things, don’t name a university in your personal statement.

Like, don’t say I want to go to Michigan state and then you submit that to university of Michigan, Western Michigan, you know, et cetera. Um, and. Use the supplement that are school specific, uh, or interviews, et cetera, to talk about, um, school specific values. The person statement is not the best place or most appropriate place rather for you to do that.

Anesha: I think I think it might the question might come from values driven kind of college research, which I, which is an approach that I’ve heard about. I apologize if folks can hear. There’s loud music in my background. Um, okay. What role does storytelling play in crafting a compelling college essay? So what is the role of storytelling in this essay?

Aya: I mean, someone argued that the college essay is a story. It is a, that’s the type of narrative or prose that students have. Um, You know, often students like to tell stories about, you know, their why, that’s how they answer the questions they might talk about, start the essay talking about particular moments in time where they felt scared or they felt, you know, challenged or there was a moment of growth and etc.

So, um, stories are very important stories. I think that is what the college personal statement is. The college personal statement is not an academic. Um, it is not the same type of essay you write in your AP English class. It is a different type of style. So you can tell a story. It is narrative driven. You can say, I, okay.

Um, you don’t have to speak in third person. You can say yourself. You can be, um, you can use, you know, quotes. Um, you can have, you know, again, you can drop in, um, You know, maybe your dad, you know, your grandparent, granddad was Chinese and he would speak to you in Chinese and you there’s little moments. You want to incorporate your essay.

You can do that. Um, um, it is not the same type of academic high school AP English essay that you’re writing. So you can again. It is a personal statement. Make it personal to you. And it’s in storytelling is very much a part of. Of the college personal statement in my professional opinion, um, yes, I would agree with

Anesha: you. Uh, how important is the essay prompt? Yeah, you spoke to this a little bit about going back to it as an anchor and so how should I approach it to make my essay memorable? How do I connect and make sure that there’s a connection between the prompt and the essay?

Aya: Um, so how important, so I’ll say this, there’s six, um, like specific prompts that Common App has, and I think there was the last one, number seven, is like choose your own topic, essentially, so you really want to make sure you’re answering the prompt.

I mean, that’s the most important thing. Was the question how important it was to answer the prompt or what exactly is the question?

Anesha: How important is the prompt and how should I approach the prompt to make the essay memorable? Um, How important is

Aya: the prompt? I mean, I, I guess I don’t quite understand that.

Um, the prompt is important. It’s, it’s selected by, um, the Common App. Um, and then you have the school specific prompts on the supplements, which are designed usually by the, uh, Office of Admissions. So, they’re important, as in, since you want to respect them by answering the question. It I would say I’m a common app.

No one prompt is more important than the other. So if you choose part number two, that doesn’t mean you’re more likely to get it in versus someone who chooses prop number six. So, um, so that is, uh, something you don’t have to worry about. And then. The second part, how can you answer the prompt? I’m sorry.

Anesha: No, no, no. It’s a complicated question. Um, how to approach the prompt to make the essay. I think it’s essentially talking about how to make it stand out. Is there a way to approach the prompt in order to make sure your essay seems more unique than any other essay?

Aya: Yeah. Once again, I don’t find, you know, the goal of being unique or standing out to be a worthy one.

I think it’s more important to be authentic. Okay.

Your essay is memorable, um, if it is. Something that is kind of relevant to your experiences toe in your own words to your own eyes. Um, I know some students might try to take more of air quoting creative approaches to perhaps what they find to be mundane experiences, but, you know, really well written essay, you know, really again, it really activates the senses.

It really sets the stage. I kind of talked about it throughout our conversation or presentation today. Some of the ways that make your essay stand out. Yeah. And, um, I think those are some of the ways that you can, you know, creatively approach the essay. But again, I, I will worry less about like, how can I be memorable and more so?

How can I be authentic? How can I tell my story that honors my lived experiences that responds to the question and something that I’ll feel proud of once it’s all said and done. And again, the essay is just one of many parts of the application, specifically for institutions that practice holistic admissions.

And those are schools that are taking not only into consideration grades, Letters of recommendation interviews, but also just backgrounds, institutional priorities, et cetera. So again, your essay is there to add to the application. It is supposed to help you. It’s not supposed to harm you. And I would just again, practice the authentic.

And again, it’s okay to have someone you trust and support or love or who loves and supports you to take a look at it, um, to get their honest opinion on it as well.

Anesha: This is more of a, I guess, topic question. Um, can writing about a current world event be okay as long as the focus is on the student and growth from it?

Aya: Yeah, for sure. Um, There are a lot of world events to write about. I mean, I think in some, um, context, uh, if a student wants to study like foreign affairs, like they want to apply to Georgetown and do Georgetown School of Foreign Service, it certainly might be more appropriate, you know, to write about, you know, a current affair that, um, a student feels like is, uh, relevant to them, and it has motivated them or inspired them, and they demonstrate some level of foundational knowledge and Or even foundational expertise to a certain extent.

Um, so yeah, I mean, I, I think, um, there is a lot of energy, uh, across the country right now in college campuses about world events, as you might. See, um, so there are again, you want to be respectful when doing this again, there are humans on the other side of a lot of emissions desk or computer screen. So, um, but I do think there, I mean, the way technology is advancing, you know, artificial intelligence, conflicts.

Uh, I think there are a lot of topics that might be relevant. You know, I think there is a common app question that asks about something that like sparks you that you can’t stop reading about or thinking about. So, that might be, there could be a current event that has induced that and you really want to write about it in a way to answer the questions and that it kind of aligns to your why, and I think it could be appropriate.

Again, it’s hard to say definitively based on without reading the essay, but I definitely know there are times where writing about current events is certainly

Anesha: I think I’ve had a student who was trying to do that of like them talking about a current event in order to demonstrate their expertise, but then it ended up being a lot that they weren’t as much of an expert as they thought they were in order to convey things effectively.

And so we had to then switch to say, okay, why are you curious about these things? Obviously, these are things you need to learn about. through the school. So, you know, how, why are you curious about it? And how do you think this type of major or the specific institution can help you learn more about that topic?

So, uh, having to be prepared to pivot, um, and thinking about those types of things. Uh, again, this is a structural question. Um, are there any additional essays required for international students?

Aya: Um, on the Common App, usually no. Um, from my experience. Um, there might, there’s additional steps definitely for Financial Aid generally.

Um, not to my knowledge that there are just specific. Do you, from your experience, I, I don’t recall there being any additional essays for international students.

Anesha: No, there are no, I don’t think there are any additional essays. There’s an additional step of proving, um, fluency, um, especially if you have not, um, gone to, had your high school or secondary education in the country, but I don’t think there’s an additional essay you need to write beyond perhaps having to take the TOEFL.

Um, is it advisable to address, um, gaps in my academic record within the context of this essay?

Aya: In the context of the personal statement?

Anesha: Yes.

Aya: Gaps in your academic record, as in, what does that mean?

Anesha: I’m assuming missed time or, um, not having been in school for an extended period of time for a health reason.

That’s normally the gaps that I tend to see.

Aya: Yeah, I mean, that, that really depends. I mean, there’s another space, uh, other kind of space on the application where you can talk about extenuated circumstances. Also, sometimes those types of, uh, gaps are better explained through your counselor. Uh, or a teacher during their letter of recommendation where they can talk a little bit about that.

Um, I don’t always find the person’s statement to be the most appropriate place for those things. Now, if you want to talk about a certain medical diagnosis, diagnosis, diagnosis that contribute to, Again, the absence of time, but also just like your life or that was motivational or transformational, etc.

You might, there might be ways to incorporate it there. But generally, there is another space in the application where you can talk about extenuating circumstances. And I find that to be the most appropriate place to do that.

Anesha: Thank you, Aya. We will leave it there. Thank you everyone for coming out. Thank you Aya for such a thoughtful session.

We hope that you gained some tips and strategies for making your essay stand out. Also, we hope that you’ll join us for our future webinars this month. Tomorrow, May 14th, we’ll have a session that goes beyond academics and highlights leadership and community involvement. I’ll be back on Wednesday, May 15th for the University of Pennsylvania panel, and we’ll be doing a deep dive into engineering as a college major on May 21st.

We hope to see you soon, but until then, take care and have a great evening.